Are You Off Today?

"Mommy... Mommy arrre you? Mommy...hode you, Mommy."
The toddler-voiced requests echoed from the video monitor as little hands grasped the top of the crib and tiny feet began to bounce.  As I turned over in bed, the overwhelming excitement to see my baby and the puffy bags under my allergic-to-morning eyes played tug-of-war with one another. My phone's clock read 7:58 and a text from a friend read, "Are you off today? Meet us by the river at 8:45 for a walk if you can!"

On the way to L's crib I texted back something about flat stroller-tires and asked the husband mid-shave if he could pretty please help me pump them up before work. "We can do this," I said to myself as I took off L's pee-soaked pajamas and threw on some outside clothes. "Walk...oweside...shewss...schveen(swing)."  She was ready to go. I'll have you know we actually arrived to our destination on time. Did our living room look like a gymnastics foam pit made of couch pillows? Yes. But ask me if it distracted her long enough to cook eggs, dangit!

The walk promoted beauty around every turn in the deep gravel path. My fore-arms wished the jogger had a motor, the birds chirped, and the conversations flowed. As soon as we made it deep into the brush and trees, with only the river to our side, we noticed a middle-aged man walking towards us. He wore a striped polo, newsboys cap, large thick rimmed glasses, and dad jeans. I was drawn to the sun-faded tattoos decorating his right arm and couldn't help but notice what he carried around his waist.

We moved several steps passed him as I curiously [OK, nervously] asked a friend of my friend's, "Was he...?"
"Yep, he was packin..." she replied.
Awesome. So here we are along the river with babies, strollers, the world's friendliest looking dog and we're joined by a man carrying a knife on one side of his belt and a gun on the other. Let's hope he's just overly prepared to meet a mountain lion, the only thing I WAS afraid of.

The other girls seemed unamused, and I was over there like, "Hellooo... Why does he keep wandering into the bushes and back onto the trail? If he is in fact a freak, we are- well..um... THE PERFECT BAIT and won't live to see his perfectly sketched mug on the 5 o'clock news."

Soon distracted, I realized L had peed through her diaper and her pants halfway through our walk. (Apparently our diapers suck). And in case you were wondering, changing an almost two-year-old's diaper while she stands up in the stroller is right up there next to impossible. 
After surviving the walk, my friend brought her precious little babe over to play. And by play, I really mean nearly get catapulted out of her carseat and softly bonked in the head a few times. It was all in good intention, that I promise you. A toddlers idea of rocking just happens at a much faster pace and sometimes kisses are hard to aim. However, throwing dog bones near babies heads because you're mad is never OK. Let's just say 2-days-in-a-row-without-a-nap Leighton ended up spending more time in timeout than she normally does in a week.

Once nap-time could no longer wait, our wonderful friends and their playful dog left our serene home filled with peace and quiet. I called our dog inside only to find he was covered in mud, and our lawn boasted a new barren patch. [And I thought our dogs were just taking turns humping each other.]

Exhaustion, frustration, and defeat swept over me....

Thank you Lord for friends that don't need me to apologize to them, clean up my act to impress them, or even pretend that I'm not having a hot-mess kind of day. [Every day]. Thank you for allowing me to never experience boredom and remain challenged. Thank you for little giggles, funny moments, and pure joy that wipe this all away. And thank you, Jesus, for sparing me from the River Man so I can live to soak up the sun while I write about it.

So to answer your original question, my friend,
"Yes, I am [a little] off today."

"One day I'll miss the pitter patter of those little feet..."
-Wendy Manwaring

Women and Planes

Upon boarding a flight this morning, I realized I was sitting next to a female pilot employed by the airline I'm flying on and a woman absolutely terrified of flying. Coincidence? I think not. I learned the pilot has flown most of her life; she spoke of NASA, the Air Force, and top secret missions to Saudi Arabia during Desert Storm. She talked about fancing sounding planes I've never heard of. Sensing the other woman's anxiety, the pilot narrated everything that was happening as the plane lifted from the runway. When the turbulence began, the other woman started breathing heavily with her head in her sweaty palms. She grasped the wrist of the pilot as the pilot attempted to distract the woman from her fear. She explained how the wings of the plane function, and the reason for feeling bumps during turbulence. She eventually reached for her iPad as the ultimate distraction, showing the woman flight maps and other information. She gave her a piece of gum to chew. They exchanged their stories and numerous family pictures during the remainder of the flight. Amongst some sad stories in the world, I love experiencing these moments, meeting genuinely kind souls, and witnessing that God even cares about the small stuff.